September means finals footy.
For a lot of men (myself included), this is the highlight of the local sporting calendar year. For partners of players (mine included), it brings relief as the months of listening to unintelligible “footy chat” and grandstand sledging will finally come to an end.
Then there are the many single women who remain blissfully unaware of finals footy, and in doing so may be missing out on an opportunity to put away Tinder and find a guy with all the “right” qualities the old fashioned way.
Single ladies take note – the position of an AFL player and his behavior on the field provides great insight into his character and personality.
Forwards (the Attention Seeker)
These are the guys that (try) to kick goals.
Forwards are confident and enjoy the spotlight that comes with kicking goals. To be fair, playing as a key forward is tough and it takes someone with a strong presence and lots of skill to play it well. Problem is - forwards don’t need an invitation to tell you that they are the most talented team member. They will also try to tell you that the “leading goal kicker” award is more important than the “B&F” (Best and Fairest, aka MVP).
Midfielders (the Trophy Boy)
These are the guys in the middle of the ground that restart play after a goal is kicked.
Midfielders are often the most talented in the team (or at least the monotony with which they win the B&F each year would suggest so).
There are two broad types of midfielders.
“Inside” midfielders are more aggressive and enjoy a physical contest. These are the guys consistently on the bottom of packs trying to win possession.
“Outside” midfielders use their speed to avoid contests and skill to deliver the football to the forwards.
The midfielders to worry about are those who only want to maximize the time they have the ball in their hands…. they may be more selfish and less genuine than you thought.
Defenders (the Quiet Achiever)
These are the guys who try to stop forwards from kicking goals.
Contrary to traditional views that defenders lack talent, the modern defender needs to demonstrate skill and composure under pressure. If you want a guy with a no-nonsense approach who is happy for his efforts to go unnoticed (at end-of-season awards ceremony that is, not in the bedroom), then defenders are the place to start.
So next time you are looking for a date why not step away from Tinder and head to your local footy club?